What kind of pimp are you?
What kind of pimp are you?
* Professor Advisory Explicit Content *
1) When you’re in the club, what do you usually do?
a) You stay seated in the bar, sipping gin & juice and talking with the waitress. Who knows, she could work for you one day… (B)
b) You’re on the dance floor dancing and singing loudly “baby shake that thang!!” (A)
c) Real pimps like you don’t go to club. They stay at home, reading Iceberg Slim books (C)
2) Your girls brought you enough money to buy a brand new car, what would you choose?
a) A bulletproof car like Benedict XVI, because your the pimp’s pope (B)
b) A 962 Chevrolet Impala Convertible to attract more women to your pimp world (A)
c) You save your money to invest in a drug-import business. You prefer to keep driving your walking-stick (C)
3) You need to look good tonight, what kind of clothes are you going to wear?
a) Your traditional chinchilla pimp coat, with your traditional fur pimp hat and your traditional gold pimp “bling bling” : “Pimp gotta look like a Pimp, damn!” (A)
b) You put your old baggy jeans, like everyday: better go unnoticed in this “pimp’s pimp’s world”.. lots of thugs want to dethrone you (B)
c) You don’t care about your appearance, it’s your girls that have to be dressed up! (C)
4) One of your girls falls in love with you, what would you do?
a) Come on, she’s faking; you beat her ass up and order to go back walking the streets. She doesn’t bring you in enough dollars :( (C)
b) You like this whore too; you decide to give her a romantic night with Champagne, lobster and Ice-T as background sound (A)
c) You do what you have to do! But you pretend she’s your favorite and tell her to remain silent about your intimate relationship: “you know, the other girls would be jealous...” (B)
5) One of your chicks asks you for some money to help her mother who is hospitalized, what are you going to say?
a) ‘B***h, you will never get a dollar out me! Get back to work b***h!” (C)
b) “Ok baby boo, but you will have to work on Sunday, that’s the deal!!” (A)
c) You think she’s lying. You decide to get rid of her because a girl you don’t trust can stab you in the back at any time (B)
6) Your oldest prostitute dies from an overdose, how do you feel?
a) You feel embarrassed...How would you replace such an experienced girl? (C)
b) You send some flowers for the funeral. Her life was sad from the beginning but she didn’t have to take the heroin you gave her (B)
c) You feel guilty and stay at the hostel mourning all day long. Sometimes, you would like to stop this life of “sex, drugs & violence”. You eventually blame society as a whole for what happened: “This life ain’t worth nothing” (A)
7) What do you like to do after your hard work?
a) You take a big frothy bath, listen to 50 cent songs, watch snoop dogg video clips and read…NBA Slam (A)
b) You try to find some new recruits. Actually, you don’t have that much free time. After midnight, you usually go at the corner to supervise your troops and to eat fried chicken with a Budweiser at the “Dirty South” cheap restaurant (C)
c) You go to “Pimpic”, the world largest pimp community on the Internet, while downloading some James Brown stuff and Blaxploitation movies (Dolemite, Foxy Brown and The Mack are at the top of your list)... (B)
8) The FBI arrests you and put you in jail, what are you going to do?
a) You decide to turn the page, become a pious inmate and write letters to your old mum where you ask her to forgive you for making her cry (A)
b) 5 years? you have to find a way to escape! But before, you try to keep contact with your girls outside. It’s not a big deal after all, you’ve lent the business to your little brother..and he’s doing pretty good so far! (B)
c) You try to catch some guys and recreate a business behind bars. $10 for an affair, you are going to thrive like you never did before (C)
A = You’re a romantic, sensitive & engaging guy! You like to play pimp BUT YOU’RE NOT! You should better buy PlayMoPimp rather than girls. Let the real P.I.M.P do this job and don’t forget you could always go back to your mother.
B = You’ re slick, audacious and clever. And you don’t have lots of mercy, which means that you could be a good pimp if you keep learning. Go on Daddy! You can do it!
C = Alright, you have no heart! You could be a good pimp. Plus, you’re pragmatic and know how to do business and of course, you don’t like women. So don’t miss the opportunity, this Pimp job has been created for you! You’re such a winner!